It occurs to me to write explicitly about the projects that have ended, were terminated, which I exited from or which became something else over time. While explicitly some project by a specific design or name ended, their lessons and some of my objectives were transported into other projects and ideas. This has admittedly happened at such a speed and in such ways that not only it left me wondering for long periods during transits, but it greatly frustrates, annoys, hurts and harms those who expect anything from me, or have old memories from me, or who do the unforgivable deed of trying to plan and map for me (there are several, who take it personally that I have a mind, body and lifepath of my own, and it shocks me that they sit like forlorn Romeos expecting that I will be back to them and do the deadbeat and dull thing that they think is exciting for me, but I would not even wish upon the corpse of a geriatric zombie).
Every now and then, these people with their dreadful and macabre ideas surface and pounce upon me, expecting that I would furnish the complete of their zombie and fetishistic fantasies. Their plans seme longer and more persistent than my own life!
Yes, I do have some axes to grind! 😄
I am too far gone in my own ideas and projects for me to even realize that some Romeos (and Juliets) are out there, waiting for me to waltz into the theaters of their minds, and live out their fantasies. I have to keep myself from nearly writing their names down with their demands and desires, and some day I might.
But for now, allow me to admit that I left some paths and programs. I did, however, learn from each place and it is all gearing up towards my work, life and project and Allah help me with this because I have surely made enemies on the path, and obtained people who resent me.
Not everyone is the same, and others have wanted me to move on five times over. Others have wondered what I do and why. And sadly, there is a group that spreads rumors and attempts sabotage and harm. At this moment, I feel as if I am sitting in some post-apocalyptic fields watching all the characters I have encountered in my life, and writing a note to them, letting them know what I no longer work on and with.
Here it goes, an inconclusive list. To whom it may concern!
(List to be shared soon!)